I should be typing lesson plans right now. Actually, I should be sleeping, and those lesson plans and the stacks of essays that have yet to be graded should be done by now. Finding my ambition is on the to-do list.
I told myself that I was going to make a conscious effort to be a better person this year. Cliché, I know. In ways, I feel like I’ve started on the right path. Today, I didn’t feed into my father’s combative nature and just walked away. I’ve been trying to live healthier. I’m calling my brother more. Things are on the up.
I have to admit, though, that seeing something upsetting does make me want to fall back into the proverbial tidal wave of self loathing. That hasn’t quite changed yet.
I still feel like I’ll never be good enough.
Come on, January, help me out here.